S.O.B. Alliance member Interested-Participant is wondering what can be done to reprogram everyone’s Microsoft Word and other software to correct the English language for something we “somehow” all missed — at some point, “trespasser” became one of the acceptable synomyms for “immigrant.”

My Word for Mac OS9 and even my Word for OSX says that the only three acceptable synonyms for “trespasser” are intruder, gatecrasher, and impostor. A “gatecrasher” can also be an interloper. But the word “immigrant” is nowhere to be found.

This is a problem. After all, as I-P notes, yesterday was the National Day of Action on Immigrant Justice (slightly changed from what I-P used to reflect what the official website says), but before some enlightened person updated the English language for us, we would have expected it to be called the National Day of Action on Trespassers’ Justice.

But we’re obviously wrong. Bill Gates, please send updates ASAP.

The ever-optimistic I-P does see a silver lining in all this:

And the next time I go hunting, I’m going to ignore the “No Trespassing” signs because I’ll be immigrating and demanding that the farmer stop scaring the deer.

Bambi beware.

Looking at the field of official candidates, maybe this “Rachel Dratch” is James Constable, the only remaining candidate I haven’t met, in disguise.

Otherwise, how could they be debating those precious “issues” on April 19? Did the invitation to the other (or is it only?) credible challenger Deb Kraus get hung up at the printer’s or lost in the mail?

UPDATE: The page still looks the same as of April 11 at 2 PM.

The official web site of the David Smith Campaign still has this Fact Sheet. Though I believe it disappeared and reappeared on Sunday so that the final paragraph could be added, it is being reproduced here in case it does a permanent disappearing act:

FACT SHEET
* Date of Birth: August 15, 1969
* Birth Location: Salt Lake City, Utah
* Wife: Jenelle M. Smith Children: Joshua 14, Tate 12, Porter 10
* Undergraduate: University of Utah, B.S. Mechanical Engineering 1994
* Graduate: Northwestern University, M.B.A. Finance 1998 Robert McCormick School of Engineering, M.E.M. 1998
* Career: Finance Professional with various Fortune 500 Companies Current Employer: Procter & Gamble
* Residence: Mason, Ohio
* Past Community Service and Awards: Eagle Scout, Scout Counselor, Junior Wrestling & Football Coach, Library Board Member.
* Previous Campaigns for Elected Office: U.S. Congress, Ohio’s 2nd District, Special Election 2005. U.S. Congress, Tennessee’s 1st District, Primary Election 2004. U.S. Congress, Utah’s 2nd District, State Convention 2002.
* Religion: Christian
* Hobbies: Camping, backpacking, training horses, wood-working.

STATEMENT
I was blessed with the opportunity to attend the highest ranking business school in our nation. Upon graduation, my professional career has given our family the opportunity to live in various places throughout the country. In September of 2001, upon reading President Bush’s biography “A Charge to Keep”, I became very interested in serving our country in the United States Congress. In each area where we have lived for the past 5 years, I have worked diligently to that end. People have been moved by my sincere and principled desires to serve. At age 36, I have gained a strong understanding of the political process. Those that have met me and have heard me speak have no doubts that I will be a valiant leader in Washington.

(With all due respect, I don’t trust my vote for one of the 100 most powerful national politicians in the US to someone who has very little life experience because he gives good speeches, presents himself well in short meetings, and has read a book by George W. Bush.)

Here’s the fun part about the Smith Campaign’s Fact Sheet and Statement page — At least all day yesterday, and through 10:30 a.m. today (and counting), you couldn’t navigate to it from anywhere else on the site. That is still true as of the time of this post. In other words, the Smith Campaign’s invaluable Fact Sheet is inaccessible to all except those who might have linked to or bookmarked it previously.

I guess the Smith Campaign thinks that the fewer who people see a Fact Sheet showing short-term residency and 3 other political candidacies in three years, the better. But he can still tell people it’s there on his web site. Charming.
________________________________

Previous Posts:

• April 11 — Here Are Actual “Signs” That the Smith Campaign Doesn’t Understand Campaign Law — Or Highway Safety
• April 6 — David Smith: NOW He Tells Us (”Deceiving From the Very Start” Edition)
• April 6 — David Smith: NOW He Tells Us (Fulton County Obfuscation Edition)
• April 3 — David Smith: NOW He Tells Us (Utah “Busted” Edition) — Smithbots Alert
• March 30 — David Smith: NOW He Tells Us (Utah “Busted” Edition)
• March 30 — David Smith: NOW He Tells Us
• March 23 — David Smith and the FEC
• March 23 — The Disappearing and Reappearing Columbus Townhall Forum Post
• March 22 — In the Ohio GOP US Senate Primary, David Smith Hasn’t Dropped Out, and Should — SOON

David Smith for Senate signs have popped up in the strangest places during the past week (all of the following were seen while driving on Northbound Interstate 71):

• Underneath the Exit sign to Kenwood Road.
• Underneath the Exit sign to Montgomery Road.
• Underneath the Exit sign to Pfeiffer Road (pictured below).



• Underneath the Exit sign to Interstate 275.
• Underneath the Exit sign to Mason-Montgomery and Fields-Ertel Roads.

I contacted the Ohio Department of Transportation (ODOT) to confirm what I thought was obvious (and it is): The sign placements on interstate and limited-access highways anywhere (except at the very end of exit ramps onto regular-access roads, and except at the very beginning of regular-access road entrance ramps onto interstate and limited-access highways) ARE ILLEGAL. The placement at I-71 and I-275 is especially outrageous because it is at the intersection of TWO interstate highways. Pulling over and getting out of a car, an SUV, or a Smith Botmobile on an interstate highway for ANY non-emergency reason is illegal, and (I thought this was obvious) dangerous.

I informed an ODOT person at the Cincinnati local office about the signs at the above locations. I would hope that the signs are removed and unceremoniously disposed of soon. We can thank David Smith and his campaign for the expenditure of taxpayer dollars necessary to clean up his mess.

I would encourage anyone who encounters similar illegal sign placements in Greater Cincinnati (no matter whose campaign it is) to contact ODOT’s local office at 821-1409, and elsewhere in Southwest Ohio to contact the District office at 800-831-2142.

I have a call into the ODOT District to see if they can inform me about the penalty for sign placements of this nature, and will let you know if I learn anything.
________________________

Addendum: I’m a bit conflicted over those signs being removed. After all, the longer they’re present, the longer they scream “We’re ignorant, lawbreaking campaign novices.”

And how about the fact that Mr. Smith has had two previous congressional campaigns(*) to learn the basics of political sign placement, and hasn’t?

(*) - OH 2005 and TN 2004; UT 2002 wouldn’t count because it was a party nominating convention and not a public campaign.
_______________________

UPDATE: For the overly curious — The picture was taken by a passenger using a digital camera while I drove in the highway’s right lane at a few miles below the speed limit. No laws were broken in the course of obtaining the above picture, nor were any animals harmed. I suppose I could have argued that getting out of the car to take a picture would have been legal, as electing Bill Pierce to the Senate, and keeping David Smith out, constitutes a legitimate emergency situation, but I resisted.

UPDATE 2: In response to smart-aleck “Get a life” commenter below, here is one law provision that would apply (bold is mine):

ORC § 5516.02. Limitation of advertising devices along interstate highways.

No advertising device shall be erected or maintained within six hundred sixty feet of the edge of the right-of-way of a highway on the interstate system except the following:

(A) Directional and official signs and notices that conform to rules adopted by the director of transportation;

(B) Signs advertising the sale or lease of the property upon which they are located;

(C) Advertising devices indicating the name of the business or profession conducted on such property or that identify the goods produced, sold, or services rendered on such property, and that conform to rules adopted by the director;

(D) Advertising devices that are located in commercial or industrial zones traversed by segments of the interstate system within the boundaries of a municipal corporation as such boundaries existed on September 21, 1959, and that conform to rules adopted by the director;

(E) Advertising devices that are located on the premises of a professional sports facility and that conform to rules adopted by the director.

+++++++++++++

ORC § 5516.99. Penalties.

Whoever erects or maintains an advertising device in violation of sections 5516.01 to 5516.14 of the Revised Code, or rules adopted thereunder, shall be fined not less than one hundred nor more than five thousand dollars.

I like the 5 thou better than the hundred bucks. :–>

Perhaps my “get a life” commenter wouldn’t mind picking up the fines for the Smith campaign? After all, an amount between $500 and $25,000 to you isn’t such “a big deal.”

Bigger point — Now correct me if I’m wrong — A Senator when taking the oath of office swears to uphold the Constitution. If a candidate, in the interest of furthering his ambitions, won’t even uphold a simple state law ….. geez, do I even need to finish the sentence?

UPDATE 3: On the way up I-71 north from UC today, I saw three more totally illegal Smith signs I hadn’t seen before:
- at about the 3.6 mile marker where the ramp from McMillan blends with I-71 (i.e., about 1000 feet from McMillan).
- under the exit sign at Dana Avenue (Exit 5).
- under the exit sign at Cross County Highway (exit 14).

So the David R. Smith Fine-o-Meter is up to eight signs, with potential fines of beween $800 and $40,000. And please don’t tell me as a commenter did below that this is an isolated Smithbot acting totally on his or her own.

As to my “agenda,” imagine that. I think Bill Pierce is better than a resume-fudging and multiple promise-breaking candidate who manages to have the only campaign that I’ve seen in 30-plus years placing signs so obviously illegally on interstate highways. What a surprise.

UPDATE 4, April 12: Right Angle Blog posts on this, and e-mails in this usual pithy style — “unreal!”

Free Links:

• Self Bankruptcy Filings Are Up: The story is only about one state, New Mexico, but I expect we’ll see more reports of this. It’s because the legal fees are higher, and certainly is no indicator of the average filer’s ability to get through the process on their own.
• The S.O.B. Alliance was all over this one yesterday (HTs to Made 4 the Internet and Return of the Conservatives, who wants to make sure Weird Al Gore knows about this) — The earth has been cooling since 1998. I expect enviros to take credit for it; you see, their thinking about it affected the grand cosmos, and …..
• Made 4 the Internet was on top of things yesterday — French President Jacques Chirac gave up on the youth employment law that drew hundreds of thousands of protesters, some of whom got violent. Face it, folks — it’s mob rule in France. He who shouts the loudest gets his way. Let it be a warning to those who might be tempted to head in their socialist direction: it’s not pleasant, and it appears there’s no turning back.
• There’s a Big Rush on for “.eu” domain names. I’m waiting for ICANN to authorize the “.eupu” domain.
• Treasury Department to Financial Markets — CHILL. Treasury doesn’t think the employment situation is inflationary. Good.
• Here’s one guy who thinks Google may be in for a fall because of arrogance, not-invented-here syndrome, and other eerie reminders of another can’t-miss operation that did — Long-Term Capital Management. Maybe the author is exaggerating, but I for one never expected to see a two-months-plus decline in traffic like this:

  

Of all things, a life insurance policy investigation leads to a joyful reunion:

(more…)